The holidays are rough on people. We get these ideas of what this time of year is supposed to mean, what we’re supposed to be doing and who we’re supposed to be with and when it doesn’t go as planned, no matter what does happen we can’t see the beauty in it. People focus on those who have died, but rarely spend a lot of time realizing just how many children have been born in the last 20 years. I’m pretty sure those two lists are comparable in length, but all we feel is the emptiness. All we know how to read of our memories is that they happened in the past, not that they happened to us so that we were lucky to experience them in the first place. I know a lot of us are lonely, and lonely can’t be easily defeated. But we don’t need to think of the holidays as a special time of year really. We need to pay attention to what has been going on in our day to day lives. What was happening in September? October? Something led to this Christmas with you being lonely. And there is no reason to put so much pressure on yourself that says, “You’re some kind of failure because you’re all alone all of a sudden this holiday season!” You were making decision about how to live your life that suited you the last few months. Are you waiting for the wrong people to surround you and take away your loneliness? Are you pushing away decent friends because you want someone else to be take their spot? Are you suffering fools because you are afraid you don’t deserve better people in your life? These are questions I ask myself from time to time, so I’m NOT judging you. I am simply trying to share some perspective. Christmas can be a warm, loving, special time of year. But it can always be a season of reflection. If you are finding yourself feeling empty and you’re not very religious, instead of taking in the “spirit of the season” the way a church might ask you to, ask yourself this one simple question. Am I loving myself enough that the people I allow in my life see me as someone who deserves only to be loved? If you lead by example, I am pretty sure they will follow.
Or just happy Tuesday.